Some stuff(ed animal) that is on my mind…

Listen,

I often feel that Brady, my oldest, inherited most of my less-than-desirable characteristics.  The worst of which is my ability to worry.  Many people who know my family know that I come from a long line of worriers.  This may best be demonstrated by our obsessive door locking.  If you were to go to my parents' house right now, I can guarantee that all of the doors will be locked. Frequently, somebody will go out to grab something from their car only to return to a locked door.  I am sure my dad can tell you many stories about being locked out while barbequing in the front yard or after shoveling the snow off the driveway.  The best part is, nobody (besides my dad) really gets upset about getting locked out because we have all been guilty of locking somebody out.  It is a reflex to lock any and all unlocked doors that we see.  I have also been known to excuse myself from the table while eating at a restaurant or run out during a shopping trip just to make sure I locked the car.  Shocking isn't it.  I love keyless entry because it saves me from having to walk all the way to the car to check.  What a great invention.

So Brady is our worrier.  Every time we get on the freeway to go anywhere, Brady will ask in a very concerned voice if we are going the right way.  Even if we are on our way home from some place he always asks just to make sure.  On longer trips, he has to be reassured multiple times that yes, dad knows the way and that we are not lost. His propensity for worrying has led him to have a very unique bedtime preparation procedure.  After we read stories and brush teeth, I go through a mental checklist to make sure everything is done or I know he will be marching out of his room to have me fix whatever I forgot to do.  Here is the checklist:

1. Close the closet

2. Close the blinds and curtains

3. Place blanket over his castle*

4. Turn on the night light

5. Turn on his music**

6. Make sure the CD player is on repeat***

7. Make sure he has his 2 favorite stuffed animals, Shamu and his polar bear named Blueberry****

8. Turn on the fan*****

9. Turn on Star Wars light saber night light******

10. No cats in the room

11. Door closed all the way as I leave

* I think it casts weird shadows or is possessed or something.

** This started last Christmas when we would turn on a CD of Christmas songs for him to listen to as he fell asleep

*** If he happened to stay awake for the whole CD he would come ask us to turn it on again.  Instead of teaching him how to do it himself, we started putting it on repeat and letting it play all night.  Now the music has to be on all the time just in case he happens to wake up in the middle of the night.  .

****Not sure where the name Blueberry came from.  He keeps one on either side of him in his bed to act as both pillow and body guard.   Also, if either Shamu or Blueberry cannot be located (which happens more often that you can imagine), he has a cougar who can step in as a backup.  He refers to this cougar as "Emergency Puma".  Did you know the scientific name for a cougar is Puma concolor?

***** Summer time only in winter we sometimes use a space heater if it is really cold.

****** Yes, this is a second night light, but this one turns itself off after 10 minutes, so it is not acceptable as his only night light, but it is too cool not to use.

I take full blame for all of this and will pay for any and all therapy that is needed down the road

Before I get into my main story, the main reason for me telling you the above information, there are 2 more pieces of information you need to know:

Item #1: Evan (the 2, almost 3 year old) has a creaky door; you know, squeaky hinges.  Hana and I decided to leave them this way so we can hear him when he gets out of bed.  He usually does this at least twice after he's been put in bed and the squeaky hinges allow us to go downstairs and still hear him when he gets up.  If he is not intercepted, he'll just wander around and play with toys.

Item #2: Sokols are also very good at storing things.  My mom has kept a lot of stuff from my childhood which I absolutely love and appreciate.  Of the many things that she kept and that I now have are a few of my favorite stuffed animals.  Two teddy bears, Light Brownie and Dark Brownie, were always my favorites and a while back I let Brady put them with his stuffed animal collection.

Now to the story:  Two days ago we had a dilemma.  Shamu had gotten dirty; spilled on during some other activity and Emergency Puma was somehow left in Evan's room.  Evan was already asleep (allegedly) and I was not about to risk opening his door which would wake him up.  Brady has a closet full of other stuffed animals; another characteristic he inherited from me.  Since he uses his stuffed animals as pillows at night they have to be the right size and softness to be accepted as a bed partner; Shamu, Blueberry, and Emergency Puma are the best for this.  After trying and dismissing several other stuffed animals, I decided to have him try Light Brownie, my old teddy bear.  After a few adjustments, Brady was content with Light Brownie as his companion for the night.  After a final wish for sweet dreams I closed his door content that everything was right with the world.  Then about 5 minutes later, Evan came sneaking out of his room, the rascal.  I took this chance to grab Emergency Puma from Evan's room.  I then peeked in on Brady, whose door does not squeak, and saw that he was still awake so I gave him Emergency Puma and set Light Brownie on his desk.  I felt like such a great dad recovering the cougar and saving the day (night).

Last night however, as we were preparing for bedtime, Brady informed me that he actually preferred my old teddy bear to Emergency Puma and that he had in fact traded back after I returned the cougar the night before.  This was turning into such a sweet, touching moment between father and son, special moment in our lives.  Here is the conversation that followed:

Me: "Do you remember my old bear's name?"

Brady: "I decided to call him Thunder."

Me: politely "His name is Light Brownie"

Brady: puzzled look

Me: "That is the name I gave him when I was a little boy, Light Brownie, you know like the brownies you eat, but since Dark Brownie was darker I named him Dark Brownie and this bear is Light Brownie."

Brady: with his puzzled look on his face, "That is not a very good name, I like Thunder better."

Me: getting a bit agitated and defensive, "Well, his name is Light Brownie, it has been for over 30 years." 

Brady: "I think that I will call him Thunder, we can just call him different names."

Me: choking back tears of fury and/or devastation, "Um… okay I guess."

Brady then proceeded to body slam poor Light Brownie Thunder onto the bed and giggle in delight.  At that moment something inside me shattered. 

Cursive sucks part 2

Listen,

I got really worked up yesterday about cursive and the fact that it is useless.  I find that I am being consumed by this topic; I am festering like a bed sore. If I keep dwelling on cursive, I might just undo the years of therapy that have made me the calm, pacifist that I am today.  I know I need to move on and accept that people want to live in the past, but before doing so here are a couple more gems form the article's comments section:

"I don't know how the students of today will know how to read cursive writing unless they learn how to write it. If anyone ever wants to be a historian moving forward if cursive is not taught in school, then they will have to go and try to find some resource to teach it to them [sic]. While I personally hate writing in cursive other than my signature, learning it has helped me better identify other's poor handwriting and allowed me to be able to read older documents and letters that I wouldn't be able to otherwise.

Hooray for cursive!"  What the hell...?  We are going to have to break this down a bit more: 

"If anyone ever wants to be a historian moving forward if cursive is not taught in school, then they will have to go and try to find some resource to teach it to them."  From what I gather, this person thinks that we should continue to teach every child cursive just in case somebody wants to become a historian.   Maybe those few individuals that want to be historians could learn cursive in historian school while learning to be a historian and stop wasting everybody else's time.  Using this person's logic, we should teach all children how to do brain surgery just in case one of them wants to be a brain surgeon.  If we don't teach them brain surgery in 3^rd grade, they'll just have to find another resource to teach it to them. 

"While I personally hate writing in cursive other than my signature, learning it has helped me better identify other's poor handwriting…"  First, let me get this straight; you hate writing in cursive, but want to force your children to do it.  This sounds like child abuse to me.   Second, as previously discussed, signatures are not cursive.  Third, this moron claims that one of the benefits of learning cursive is that it has given them the ability to "better identify other's poor handwriting."  What an amazing skill to have.  I would imagine that identifying other's bad handwriting is very gratifying.  I can think of nothing I'd like to be able to do more than sit around and point out bad handwriting to  untrained individuals.  Maybe they would be willing to teach a community education class at the local rec center.  My only counterargument is that I don't have to learn to play the violin to know when somebody is playing it badly. 

"Hooray for cursive!"  Go f#@% yourself.

"It's not about cursive writing. It's about the development of a human being, and yes, cursive writing should remain in the curriculum because it develops the wholeness of a human being in ways other activities do not."   Wait, what? Is this person really trying to say that learning cursive makes you a better human being?  Do they really think that learning cursive "develops the wholeness of a human being in ways other activities do not?" For real?  I will have to keep this in mind when I die and face judgment.  Here is how it will go:

Him: I see here that you watched football on Sunday, drank Coke, listened to Tool, and used foul language on occasion.  What do you have to say for yourself?"

Me: "Well, I did learn cursive in third grade."

Him: "Well why didn't you say so, come on in."

If what this person is saying is true then I shudder to think of the person I would have been today if I hadn't learned cursive as a child…truly terrifying.

Cursive Sucks...

Listen,

I just finished reading a ridiculous article on ksl.com.  The article asks the question: "Should Kids Still Learn Cursive Writing?"   I don't even want to link to it because of the stupidity of it, but for your "enjoyment" here is the link.   The article quotes Granite School District literacy coach Tricia Bromka in support of teaching cursive.  I do not know Tricia Bromka nor do I know what qualifies her to be a "literacy coach".  What I do know, is that she makes some very weak arguments for why cursive should be taught in our schools.  The following are some of her arguments (in bold) and my response to that argument:

 

1. "If you don't allow access to that form of writing, then you are taking away knowledge and knowledge is power"  You're kidding right?  We don't teach our children how to build bombs or cook methamphetamine in school either, so I guess by withholding that knowledge we are depriving them of additional power.

 

2. "One report showed writing in cursive helps your brain … handwriting is connected to higher-order thinking skills. If you are struggling over how to write every time, your fluency goes down."   I can show you one report to prove just about anything…how about a reference?  And if you are concerned about kids "struggling over how to write every time" how about not teaching them a worthless way to write.

 

3. "Some boys may never master cursive, but fluent writing is important."  Why is it important again?   And I am not one to play the "sexist card" but this statement really rubs me the wrong way.

 

4. "People should still be able to read cursive, as there are many documents out there written in cursive."  First off, being able to read cursive and being able to write cursive are 2 very different things.  Anybody who has had a child knows that they can learn to recognize and read letters and numbers far before they have the ability to write them.  Also, there are many documents written in Chinese and Russian, but we are not teaching those to our children.

 

5. "You need to expose them to different writing, have them be able to practice, but for their own fluency and mastery, they need explicit instruction on where they are in their developmental stage"  I'm not really sure what she is trying to say here.  It almost seems to me that she is arguing against teaching cursive in schools since not all children will be at the correct "developmental stage" to learn it.  I'm not sure though, at this point it seems like children will continue to learn cursive because some lady thinks it's a good idea.

 

If you haven't figured it out yet, I am against teaching cursive in school.  Cursive is an illegible form of writing.  In fact, in Washington (state) a law was passed in 2006 which states, "If a prescription isn't hand-printed, typed or electronically generated, it can't be filled."    It is essentially illegal for doctors to write prescriptions in cursive.   

 

Here is a sampling of the comments that people shared in support of cursive:

 

- "I think we need to teach the basics of the fundamentals, this being one of them ! [sic]"  When did cursive become fundamental?  And what exactly does the writer mean by "the basics of the fundamentals" anyway?  What a dolt…

 

- "Sometimes learning is done simply for the sake of learning and each piece of knowledge enriches our lives … You will NEVER waste your time learning something new!"  I feel obliged to bring up making bombs and cooking meth again.

 

- "Children need to be able to Read cursive, the best way to learn is to be able to read and write it. Therefore it should be taught. I think that sums it all up."  Boy, I'd like to see this guys solution to world hunger… "People are hungry, they should be able to eat, the best way to eat is with food.  Therefore they should get food.  I think that sums it all up."

 

- "I think it's important to have good handwriting skills. I treasure the pieces of handwriting that I have found since my parents have died. Yes, the keyboard skills are important, but they don't leave a lasting example of someone."  And how exactly does printing not fulfill your desire to leave a lasting impression?  My printing style is just as unique as my cursive style.  I do like to go back and see my grandma's writing in recipe books and old letters, but her writing  would still exist without cursive.

 

- "You need cursive to sign your own name on documents. Yes, it is still needed."  No you don't.   Most people use something that has elements of cursive, but it is certainly not cursive.  Having or using a signature that is plain, outright cursive would be no more unique that the way you print your name.  Signatures are as unique as the individual wants it to be. They are certainly not cursive

 

- And finally this:

"And I guess next question is should we teach basic arithmetic? After all everyone has a calculator in their cell phone."  Comparing learning how to write in cursive to learning basic arithmetic is one of the single most asinine things I have ever heard.

Makers of Trouble

Listen,
Those that know my kids know that Evan likes to create trouble.  Here he is with his cast from earlier this summer.

And here he is just before getting the pins removed when the cast came off

So the trouble-making abilities of Evan have never been in doubt, but now I am starting to worry about Bronson...

He likes to try to slither under the gate at the top of the stairs

Unable to quit...

Listen,

I am willing to admit defeat here.  On 6/28/11 I said that I was done with Facebook.  After spending several days of not going to Facebook, I have decided that Facebook plays an integral part of my life.  What drove me back was the following string of events

First, was sharing the following picture with my sister-in-law Kristin:

Second was a comment on said shared picture from my Aunt Joia telling me that she did not want me to quit facebook.  I had no idea she cared.  I was touched.

 

Third, I found this really great quote from Stephen King that I wanted to share:

"Harry Potter is about confronting fears, finding inner strength and doing what is right in the face of adversity. Twilight is about how important it is to have a boyfriend."

 

And to complete the comeback, one of my favorite Brazilian mission companions sent me a friend request.  

 

I know I am leaving myself vulnerable to a lot of “told you so” remarks, but so it goes.  So what I have decided to do is to “clean up” my facebook situation and get rid of all the clutter.  I realize that facebook is as good or bad as you make it and I make it better.

Back from Vacation

 

Listen,

I just got back from vacation.  We went up to Washington for a family reunion and to stay a few days with Hana's brother Marcus and his family.  Here are a few things I wanted to share about going on this trip.

1. Here is an excerpt of nearly every conversation I had when telling somebody where I was going on vacation:

-Random Person: "Where are you going on vacation?
-Me: "Washington"

-Random Person: "State?"

-Me: "Yes."

Now, if I were going to take a trip to our nation's capital, the conversation would go like this:
-Random person: "Where are you going on vacation?"

-Me: "Washington D.C."

Maybe it's just me, but when somebody says "Washington" I assume state unless they tell me otherwise.  I don't know…

2. This is what Brady had to say whilst urinating on watering some wildflowers on the side of I-90 somewhere in Montana:  "This is a lot like a water fountain, only grosser."  

3. Free hotel breakfast is one of my favorite things.  On one occasion I ate 3 Belgian waffles, one breakfast burrito, (eggs, bacon, and sausage), and two biscuits with country gravy.  I washed this all down with 5 glasses of POG (passion fruit, orange, and guava) juice.  Using IHOP's online menu as a resource, I figure I ate upwards of $30 of food that morning.  Not to mention what the boys and Hana ate.  I bet we took them for $50 that day.  Take that Best Western Plus Kennewick Inn.

4. Red Vines and Swedish Fish are my 2 favorite snacks to eat in the car.

5. I hate people that do not understand how to drive on a 2 lane highway.  This seemed to occur more frequently in Utah than in Idaho, Oregon, Washington (state), or Montana.   

6/28/11

Listen,

First, we have had sick kids all week.  Evan got his cast off a week ago and he started acting/being sick that night.  I thought that we were all better on Sunday, but that is not the case.  Nobody threw up on Sunday, but on Monday Brady was back at it.  He (Brady) is the funniest kid.  He walks around the house with a bowl and just pukes into it as needed and just keeps on going.  He would make a great bulimic, since he doesn't seem to mind vomiting all that much.  We bought a bunch of Powerade to keep him hydrated.  His favorite flavor is fruit punch, so he has been puking a lot of red, which is kinda fun especially if you are a member of the Sokol family and have heard about Jeff puking Shasta fruit punch into the console of our Bronco during a blizzard in Yellowstone National Park.  It is a great story if you haven't heard it. 

 

Second, I am done with facebook.  I have had a roller coaster relationship with facebook since I first signed up whenever that was.  There has been some good times, but like most roller coasters, I fell like I just spent too much time standing in line, and by standing in line I mean reading crap that people post and trying to think of some witty response. I just deleted the facebook app from by ipod, seriously I just did.  I stopped typing, picked up my ipod and deleted it. I just don't care what all these "friends" are doing all the time.  I am very proud of my wife for never joining facebook.  She will most likely never read this, but I am sorry for making fun of her for not joining.  She was right all along (as usual).  As I type this, I find it interesting that Microsoft Word does not recognize "facebook" or "Facebook" as words.   So if anybody has anything they want to share with me, such as song lyrics, pictures of your "cute" kids, or other vital information you will have to find another way. 

 

Third, I have friends and family who work at two different pharmacies that have been held up at gunpoint for Oxycontin in the last few weeks.  If you are one of the people doing this please stop, you are making a bad decision.  (Note: I am referring to both the people doing the gun pointing as well as the people working in retail pharmacies.)

 

Best Food Blog

Listen,
Check out the Sokol Family Favorites Cookbook Blog here
http://sokolfamilyfavorites.blogspot.com/
My sister-in-law Jacquelynn put this together and it is amazing.  You honestly can throw all your other cookbooks away now that you have this.
Some favorites include:

• My grandma's apple pie
• My baby back ribs
• Hana's Chocolate Revel Bars
• Jacquelynn's Sopa de Lima

and many many more...

Jimmer...

Listen,
Or should I say look...

This picture on the cover of the most recent Sports Illustrated. 

I haven't posted much about Jimmer, but I must say that he has me actually caring about basketball, which has NEVER happened before in my life. 

Go COUGS!!!

Just a couple of things...

Listen,

 

It happened again, just now.... I walk into the restroom and there is somebody sitting in one of the stalls having a conversation on their cell phone.  There is a very short list of things that should ever happen in a bathroom stall and talking on your cell phone is not on that list.  Now that I think about it, I hope this guy was talking on their cell phone and not something else.  I give each and every one of you my word that I will not carry on a phone conversation with any of you while I am sitting on a toilet. 

 

Now for something that has been bugging me for a while now...

I think all songs by the band Sugar Ray should be banned from the radio.  I admit, I bought their CD in the late 90s like so many other people, but when a song by that band comes while I'm driving, I feel the need to drive my car into oncoming traffic while vomiting.  I continue to love a lot of 90s music, but their stuff is utter crap. 

 

That's enough for now 

Disappointing snacktime

Listen,

I admit it, I am not a healthy person.  I eat food that is bad for me and most of the time I don't even feel bad about it.  Sure, there are days that I eat 36 chicken McNuggets for dinner and then regret it at 3 in the morning (perhaps a story for another time), but after taking a couple Tums-Smooth Relief, I go back to bed and feel fine. 

 

I buy a lot of crap out of the vending machines at work.  I am pretty sure if I stopped buying from them, the guy could restock it once a month and nobody would be the wiser.  There is a reason that Diet Mountain Dew is always the soda to be sold out first and there are never any Hostess apple or cherry pies in there for more than 12 hours.  Somtimes though, I don't want a sweet treat.  I need something salty, something like a bag of FRITOS Brand Chili Cheese Flavored Corn Chips.  Just listen (or read) what it says on the back of the package: "With a rich, hearty chili & cheese flavor and powerful crunch, FRITOS Corn Chips are an unmistakable all-American Original.  Nothing Satisfies like FRITOS BRAND."  If you have not tried these, you are missing out on one of the better chili & cheese flavored snacks available on the market today...

 

At least that is how it used to be...

 

Recently, and by recently I mean the last 4 bags that I have purchased, I have noticed that there seems to be less chili cheese flavored goodness in every bag.  It is not that there are fewer Fritos in each bag, I am quite confident that the number has remained constant.  What I am refering to is the amount of seasoning, or chili cheese dust, known as CCD, on the Fritos Brand corn chips themselves.  I have come to this conclusion because there does not seem to be as much CCD on my finger tips when I finish a bag.  Each finger tip used to possess a bounty of CCD to enjoy once the Fritos were all consumed.  Lately however, I feel that my finger tips are nearly as clean as before I had feasted on the Fritos Brand corn chips.  I was going to write to Frito-Lay Inc and inquire about the amount of CCD being used in their product, but I fear I may not be able to handle the truth.  They have a toll-free hotline for questions or comments, open weekdays from 9 to 4:30 central time, but I just can't bring myself to make the call. 

 

I guess I'll try the TGI Friday's Brand Chedder and Bacon Flavored Potato Skins next time...

 

 

An update...

Listen,

 

I have decided to provide a progress report regarding my six New Year's resolutions that I presented to you earlier.

1. Empty my cats' litter box three times a week.

  This one was a terrible disaster this week.  On more than one occasion I thought to myself, "Bob, you need to clean out the cats' litter box."  Sadly, I was overcome with laziness and only did this once this week.  This may not seem like a very big deal to you non-cat-owners, but I have 2 cats and a relatively small litter box for them.  I can't imagine flushing my toilets only once a week, but maybe I'll should try that, just so I know how it makes the cats feel.

2. Organize my Star Wars toy collection

  I made a little bit of progress with this one.  I purchased some small plastic Tupperware-type containers to help store some of the small weapons and other assorted accessories.  I previously was using some small plastic bowels from Ikea that I had found in our kitchen cupboard, but apparently the kids needed them for food or some such.  I think these new Tupperware-type plastic storage containers will work nicely.  They are about the size of a standard shoebox, but only about 2 inches deep.  The lids snap on very tightly, which is what drew me to purchase them in the first place. 

3. Cook more

  Saturday, I made my first recipe out of my new Bobby Flay cookbook.  It was a Spanish-rubbed chicken with a parsley and mint sauce.  It was pretty tasty.   Brady was not a fan at first, but after pouring some salt on it, he said it was pretty good.  The best part about cooking was that Hana did the dishes, which is my job when she cooks dinner. 

4. Reuse the same cup several times rather than get another cup dirty.

  On Saturday, I was watching the Colts-Jets playoff game and went upstairs to get another Coke Zero.  I then realized that I left my cup downstairs.  So, instead of getting a new cup, I actually walked back downstairs and got my old cup and then went back up for more soda.  In retrospect, I should have just taken the 2-liter bottle back downstairs with me…what was I thinking?!?  I am making an effort here, but it is not as easy as I thought it would be. 

5. Get more sleep.

  No real progress here… I did actually try to go to sleep at 11:15 last night, but stayed up playing ipod games until 1:30, which leads me to #6.

[s]6. Obtain three stars on every available level of Angry Birds on my ipod[/s]

  After trying to get three starts on a few levels this week, I was unsuccessful and actually went to youtube.com where you can watch videos of people achieving a 3-star score on every level, so you can mimic what they do.  After doing this for a couple of tricky levels, I decided that I had hit a new low in my life by doing this.  I have since shifted my focus to "Tiny Chef" and "Mega Jump".  I am officially crossing #6 off of my list of resolutions.

Resolution revolution

Listen,

 

Many of you fine people may have given up on me… well maybe not given up on me, but given up on my blog.  Sadly, I just don't possess a lot of the anger/frustration/rage/fury that I had back when this blog started and I was dealing with idiots and morons on a daily basis.  Nowadays, I only have to deal with idiots and morons on my commute, at church, and occasionally at my parents' house when certain family members are present.  So I apologize for that I guess.

 

Anyway, at this time of year, people like to talk about New Year's resolutions.  I generally hate those people.   However, in an attempt to better my life and the lives of those around me, I have made a couple of New Year's resolutions. I thought that sharing them with people may help me stick to these better than if I kept them to myself.   Some of these may seem a bit on the trivial side, but they truly are of utmost importance.

 

1. Empty my cats' litter box three times a week. 

2. Organize my Star Wars toy collection

3. Cook more

4. Reuse the same cup several times a day rather than get another cup dirty.

5. Get more sleep.

6. Obtain three stars on every available level of Angry Birds on my ipod

 

That should just about do it…

Yep, this is going to be one fantastic year.

 

 

2011

Peace 2011 Chocolate New Year's Card

Create personalized holiday cards online at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Off he goes...

Listen,
So Brady started Kindergarten today...kinda crazy if you ask me.  Perhaps more crazy is that he is attending Kindergarten at the very same school where I attended Kindergarten.  Like sand through the hourglass...these are the days of our lives.
I am very glad that Hana was emotionally stable enough to take him to school this morning, because I was a wreck.    Anyway, the picture below is outside the school with his cousins, Olivia and Oceana, who I believe are in sixth and fourth grade.  It is fun for him to go to the same school they do...I never went to school with any cousins until I went to BYU. 

It was very strange to hold baby Bronson today and remember so vividly when Brady was so tiny and helpless and here he is starting school.  From all accounts he did really well and is even excited about taking the bus.   He is truly an amazing kid and I am a very proud dad.

And so it begins.

Brady, Evan, _________!!! Come up for dinner!!!

Listen,

The baby is due in less than 2 weeks… yes, less than 2 weeks.  If I were hand-writing this blog post, you would see how badly my hands are shaking right now.  I am nearly in full panic mode… maybe about 85% of capacity.

Let's go through my list of things to get done before the baby is born:

- Trade in the X-terra (and my soul) for a  minivan…check*

- Move easy-E into Brady's room…check

- Buy a new carseat…check

- Get baby clothes and stuff out of storage…check (Hana did most of this)

- Figure out the work situation…check

- Decide on a name for the baby… … … …D'oh!

What to name him… that is a tough one.  Brady's name was decided on within an hour of the ultrasound when we found out we were having a boy.  Evan took a little longer, but I'm pretty sure we knew at least 2 or 3 months before he arrived.  This child, this poor nameless child…

Hana and I have been going back and forth and side to side and up and down on names for this baby.  We've scoured the interweb, read dozens of baby name books (well, Hana has anyway).  We've had it narrowed down to 2 names at least 10 times, but without fail, one of us decides to veto one or both names and we start all over.  I am getting desperate…I am open to suggestions, but don't want anything stupid or lame, so go ahead and share your thoughts.  Who knows, if we end up using your idea, you could maybe even win a prize**.

 

* I am actually quite surprised how much I like our minivan.  I have been meaning to write more about it, but have not yet.  For all you guys (and ladies) out there who hate the idea of a minivan let me tell you, I love it.  I am not ashamed to say it, I love my minivan.  Never thought you'd hear that come out of me did you!?!

 

**Prize limited to the change I have in my pocket or the value of the empty soda cans sitting on my desk at work if you were to take them to be recycled, whichever is more.  I do drink a lot of soda and I am lazy about crushing the cans, so they tend to pile up.  This could be a real money making opportunity for you.

 

 

Diet Mountain Dew

Listen,
So I was just about ready to go to bed tonight when I decided to add up how many ounces of Diet Mountain Dew I drank today.  For the rest of this post, I will refer to Diet Mountain Dew as DMD.  I do not usually call DMD "DMD," but I am now for the sake of saving precious energy on keystrokes.  Though now that I think about it, I probably will spend more keystrokes and energy explaining this than if I had just typed out "Diet Mountain Dew" several more times.  So, here is my list:
8:30 am: I had a 44 ounce fountain DMD from the gas station near where I work. 
11:30 am: I drank one 12 ounce can of DMD.  I had finished off my first DMD and I had a Coke Zero after that, so I was back to the DMD at 11:30.
1:30 pm:  I drank 1 can of DMD
6:00 pm: I drank a glass of milk with dinner, but had a can of DMD for dessert

8:30 pm: I played ward softball tonight from 7 pm until 8:23pm.  Hana was nice enough to buy me a 52 ounce Diet Coke at the gas station near the softball field which I drank during the game (the Diet Coke, not the softball field).  When I got home, I filled up my cup with 2 cans of DMD and drank them as well.  It was hot outside.  In case you were wondering we won 22 to 10.

It is now officially Wednesday, so I can tally my fluid ounces of DMD:
44+12+12+12+24=104.  Not too bad eh?

For those of you keeping track at home, I used 262 keystrokes to right out my explanation of using DMD instead of just writing out Diet Mountain Dew.  I am not sure if when you capitalize a letter it counts as one or 5 two keystrokes, but for the sake of this blog, I am only counting it as one.  "Diet Mountain Dew" takes 17 key strokes (as I count them) without the quotation marks of course, and DMD takes only 3 (as I count them).  This is a savings of 14 keystrokes.  I used the abbreviation "DMD" 12 times after my explanation of why I was using "DMD" in place of DMD.  This includes the one time used during the explanation and two times since adding up my total.  I am not counting the times I placed quotation marks around the letters because in those instances, I was not abbreviating DMD as "DMD."  Crap, that makes 14 times now I think.  Why am I writing this at 1:00am?  So, by my calculations, which are slightly impaired at this hour, I

saved 196 keystrokes by using the abbreviation.  If you recall, I spent 262 keystrokes writing my explanation so I wasted 66 keystrokes by using the stupid abbreviation.  What a freaking waste.

Hey look its Mario Lemieux, the greatest #66 of all time.


I actually had other stuff I was going to include in this post, but lucky for you I am going to stop now.  I am really going to regret this tomorrow.

The following is an image of Mathman as seen on Square One TV.  I don't belive that this is the real Mathman, but rather an artist's portrayal of Mathman... I hope that will suffice.

T-minus 2 months...

Listen,

Today is June 11, 2010.  You may be asking yourself, "What is the significance of this day?" or "why would Bob blog today of all days?"  Let me remind you that in 2 months, we are scheduled to receive another "bundle of joy" into our little family.  Yes, only 2 months until the new baby boy is due for delivery.  The other day, Brady asked Hana how the baby gets out of her belly.  He thought maybe through her mouth.  Hana told him it is kind of like magic.  Now, I have been by Hana's side during the birth of both Brady (C-section) and Evan (the old fashioned way) … never mind I am not going to go any further with that train of thought.

 

So with only two months to go I am kinda freaking out a little… just a general low-grade freaking out with occasional exacerbations. 

 

In other happenings…

The Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup.  I am surprised I didn't blog at all during the playoffs.  It was great to watch some games with my dad.  I had Brady watch with us when they handed the Stanley Cup to the Blackhawk's captain Jonathan Toews (rhymes with haze and phase).  He thought it was a cool trophy and asked if anybody ever ate out of the top bowl.  From my understanding that has happened on many occations.  One member of the Blackhawks, Duncan Keith, lost 7 teeth in a game against the San Jose Sharks during the playoffs.  That is just cool.

 

The cherry tree in my backyard fell over when it snowed back on May 24^th.  It was crazy.  Our backyard feels bigger now without the tree taking up all the space it did.  Don't get me wrong, I really liked the tree, but part of me really likes that it is gone. 

 

The World Cup starts today.  I always get a big nostalgic during the World Cup.  I was in Brazil for the 1998 World Cup.  That was an amazing time to be there.  Them folks really like soccer (futebol). 

 

I am tired

 

Right now I have 8 empty soda cans and 1 unopened soda can on my desk right now.  Here is the breakdown:

4 – Coke Zero (empty)

3 – Diet Mountain Dew (empty)

1 – Diet Mountain Dew: Code Red (empty)

1 – Coke Zero (unopened)

 

I will stop wasting your time.

 

 

Nine Years…

Listen,

 

I graduated from High School in 1996.  I graduated from Pharmacy School in 2005.  That means that it took me nine years to graduate from college.  Granted, I took a couple years off and talked around southern Brasil, but still.  Looking back at those nine years, they seemed to last an eternity (some more than others).  The first years seemed like 7 years and the second year seemed like 5 years.  The third year seemed like 7 years again and the fourth year felt like 8 years.  The fifth year I got married and that seemed like just a year, but then Pharmacy School started later that year and it started seeming like 2 years, so in September of the fifth year it seemed like 2 years spilling into the next year and that started feeling like 4 years.  So at the end of the fifth year and into the sixth year seemed like 5 years.  The seventh year felt like a year and a half.  The eighth year seemed like 1 regular year and the ninth year seems like 2 years too.  So even though it was only 9 years it seemed more like 37.5 years… maybe that is why I feel old.  If you tack those extra 28.5 years on, I turned 60 in February.  It is all starting to make sense now. 

 

Anyway, back to the task at hand.  Nine years.  It was nine years ago today that I spent my last night as a single guy.  That is right, tomorrow is the ninth anniversary of my wedding day; the day that I tricked Hana into marrying me.  She had no idea what she was in for.  Those of you that know me and those of you that know Hana know how lucky I am.  She is truly an amazing person and I am grateful that she puts up with me and all my "me-ness."  Nine years seems like a long time, but we're just getting warmed up.  With baby boy #3 on the way we are ready to tackle yet another adventure together. 

 

I would keep going on and on about how amazing she is, but she never reads my blog (except when I make her read it so she can see how funny I really am), so I won't waste your time…that and I'm hungry.  Off to the vending machines...oh wait, Hana packed me left overs today... 

A "Simple" Milky Way?

Listen,

I did not bring a lunch to work today.  I don't bring a lunch to work a lot of days.  Usually I can keep the hunger at bay by downing another Diet Pepsi, Diet Coke, Diet Mountain Dew, Diet Mountain Dew Code Red, Coke Zero, or the like, but not today.  I decided to peruse the vending machines in the break room.  I try not to do this very often, because the food sold in vending machines is generally not healthy food.  There are exceptions to this, like down on BYU's campus I used to buy sandwiches or apples out of vending machines.  One of the vending machines here has yogurt, string cheese, milk, and Pop Tarts.  Maybe Pop Tarts aren't healthy.  Last time I experimented at the vending machine, I ended up with a strange and unsatisfying bag of Sun Chips: Spicy Chipotle and you all know how that turned out...   Well I saw something there at station F4 that caught my eye, a Milky Way Simply Caramel candy bar.  I have a long standing love of the Milky Way candy bar.  I don't remember exactly when I was introduced to the Milky Way Dark candy bar, but I enjoy them a great deal as well.  Don't get me wrong, I like the Snickers candy bar, but I am not always in the mood for something "packed with peanuts."  The 3 Musketeers candy bar is not one that I like very much at all, especially since the reformulated them.  Last Halloween I stole a 3 Musketeers Mint candy bar from Brady's stash and regretted it dearly… yuck!!!  Back to the Milky Way Simply Caramel candy bar;  I thought to myself, "Hmmm… a Milky Way candy bar is simple enough as it is, caramel, nougat, and chocolate."  Then I thought about See's Chocolates.  (They are my favorite kind of chocolates, by the way.)  I thought about how my favorite favorite is the dark chocolate truffle, but my second favorite is their standard caramel.  "What the heck," I said out loud, but not loudly enough for people to think that I am crazy and talking to myself.  The Milky Way Simply Caramel candy bar is just caramel covered in chocolate.  It was a darn fine treat!!!  I am grateful to report a pleasant vending machine experience to you all.  I think Steve would like this candy bar. (I am speaking specifically about my brother Steve, not just any random Steve, but you never know who might enjoy one of these)

 

In case you were wondering, here are my top 10 candy bars in no particular order.

Butterfinger Crisp

Take 5 Peanut Butter

Take 5

Milky Way

Whatchamacallit

Almond Joy

Kit-Kat

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups*

Caramello

Snickers

 

*I am not sure if these count as a candy bar since they are "cups" but I am counting them anyway.  I did not count Peanut Butter M&Ms, Reese's Pieces, or Junior Mints cause they are obviously not candy bars.

 

 

In other news, we went and saw How to Train Your Dragon.  I loved it and so did Brady.